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2/24/2023

6 Ways to Navigate the Workspace As a Neurodivergent Employee

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man sitting at a desk using a laptop
​What has kept so many companies from taking on neurodivergent people? Well, we already have the answer to that question; they are simply - different. And, what makes a good employee? Preferably someone with a salesperson personality, a goal-getter, a team player, someone whose emotional intelligence shines brighter than the Sun, and their ability to network and conform to standard practices without needing special accommodations is but a mere bonus. - Social norms. "Us" and "them ."Fortunately (accidentally or intentionally, does it matter at this point?), times are changing. Slowly but steadily. It's official: neurodiversity got its toe in the door. The big toe, or the pinky toe, is all the same. We're in. And that's all that matters now. So, neurodivergent individuals and thriving at work. Easy? - No. Impossible? -Absolutely not. Here are 6 ways to navigate a workspace as a neurodivergent employee.

Defining Neurodiversity

​Just like our pinky toes, all our beautiful brains are unique. However, for the majority of people, their brains are what we could call "comparable" and neurologically similar enough, as there are no obvious differences in the way their brains function, or simply put: the majority of the human population perceives the world in the same way.  (individual preferences, opinions, and styles excluded, of course) Now, in comes the rainbow. The unicorn. "The others." Their handsome brains are just wired a bit differently. (fundamentally, to be exact) For neurodiverse individuals, information and sensory processing, communication, and social understanding are of a different format due to neurological differences such as:
  • autism
  • ADHD
  • dyslexia
  • dyspraxia
  • dyscalculia
  • dysgraphia
  • Tourette's syndrome
-and more.
head silhouette with ADHD written on it and multicolor flowers and twines imitating hair
How do we navigate the workspace as a neurodivergent employee? We own our uniqueness.

Neurodiversity: how to thrive at work

Approximately 1 in 7 people are neurodivergent, and we say: that's great news. There's tangible evidence of a growing awareness among employers across the globe. How did that happen? It's simple. This world needs diversity; it needs unique, innovative, solution-oriented minds. And neurodivergent individuals can deliver. Here are some basic tips for navigating the workspace.

1. Authentic self

​Let's put this into perspective; it's your colleague's first day on the job. They approach you, shake your hand, and introduce themselves. "Hi. I'm Michael; I'm new here. I struggle with seasonal depression. Nice to meet you." - So, the collective will now remember Michael through a different lens; "the guy who's struggling, possibly all the time" The point is, there's no need for any of us to foreground a certain feature that can consequently label us as "being different," or not belonging. Is being neurodivergent one's entire identity? Of course not; it’s but a mere fraction. Instead, put your authentic self on a pedestal. Remember: disclosing your medical diagnosis isn't imperative unless you want to, of course.

2. Know your stuff

​Neurotypical or neurodivergent, all the same, knowledge is power. The less prepared and knowledgeable we are, the more anxious and insecure we'll feel about our position and our workspace. So, how do we go about it? How does one navigate the workspace as a neurodivergent employee? - You set goals. What do we mean by that? Improvement. Constant improvement; hard skills, soft skills. The same rules apply to everyone: stay on top of your game. Do your best. Work hard. If you're already curious by nature - a job begun is a job half done. The more accomplished you become, the more confident you'll feel. Action - reaction. Simple as that.
yellow neon sign
Do the work.

3. You're different. Embrace it.

​You say or do something that slightly differs from what a neurotypical brain would deem appropriate, and just like that! There it is; the shame-inducing stare. How familiar. You've witnessed the bewilderment in your interlocutor's eyes countless times before, no? So, what's the big deal? No time for shame. You’re yourself. Your true, authentic self. Instead of fearing judgment or experiencing heaps of shame, turn the tables: talk about your struggles and gain confidence through being unapologetically unique. You see things differently. So? - They do, too. Already something in common.

4. It's an advantage; own it

​HR processes are being reformed as we speak. Why? Because the word is finally out. Neurodivergent individuals are, indeed, a rare catch. Prominent companies (HP, Microsoft, Dell, Chase, SAP, IBM, Deloitte, etc. - the list is LONG) are more than happy to welcome and accommodate neurodiverse talent. Why? To illustrate, we'll use this example: neurotypical individuals can see the visual spectrum of colors going from red to indigo; a neurodiverse individual might not be able to pick up on the color blue, but they can see in infrared. This means: you have a person on your team who can see in the dark. An asset to the company? And then some! Are you different? - Use it.
red skies with blue trees contrast
Neurodivergent? It's called being gifted

5. Reframing vulnerabilities

​The chances are you've been bullied, made fun of, humiliated, and disrespected. You've seen the worst in people. Yet, you're here. You survived. And that's what makes you stronger than most. It's time to reframe those vulnerabilities; pain invites personal growth. (we all wish it weren't so) Today, you stand tall as a kind, empathetic, self-aware individual whose strengths are reflected in resilience, creativity, flexibility, "thinking outside the box," and, of course - being magnificently funky. A wonderful, autonomous human being with integrity who is capable of saying no with confidence, if need be.

6. Something of an iceberg

Fun fact: 9/10, or 90% of the volume of an iceberg lives below the water's surface. - Human beings are the same. Neurotypical or neurodivergent. Normality is but a social construct; some are just better at following the guidelines. So, please, do remember it whenever you doubt yourself or if the feeling of impending isolation starts to creep in. There is no "us" and "them." Not really. It's merely that 1/10 of an iceberg trying to stay afloat. We're all a bit quirky and socially awkward deep down. You're just not hiding yours.

Lastly

​To successfully navigate the workspace as a neurodivergent employee, let this be your guide: "If you can't join them, stand out." And then, stand up. Proud and tall.
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Author Bio

Duncan Villegas is a full-time blogger, currently collaborating with Bravo Moving relocation experts. He deeply enjoys immersing himself in sociology, film noir, and making waffles. 

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1/7/2023

6 Strategies for Saying No With Confidence

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Saying no with confidence.
​Say yes to this, say yes to that... Yes, saying yes can bring much positivity and good into your life. But that doesn't mean you have to make the word 'No' a villain in your story. Knowing when to say no might be even more important than knowing when to say yes. Avoiding using 'no' as an answer can get you into a much trouble since people are built to sense and use the people-pleasers. If you have a problem with that, don't worry! You're not the only one, and we're here to help. Here are six effective strategies for saying no with confidence. 

1# Acknowledge that it's good for your health

​The first thing we need to unravel is the sensation of negativity that is the core and base of this word. Yes, it's a negation, but it can bring many positive things to your life! This is the one word that is the absolute must for setting personal boundaries. If your boss wants you to stay and work after your shift, you need to know how to decline that and not worry about it afterward. It may seem harsh at first glance, but the boundaries are the things that make your personality.
If you have none, you're at risk of becoming a fluid being that doesn't know what they are. Seeing this issue from the perspective of your health will help you realize the benefits of saying no. Hopefully, you'll start using it more often and setting your boundaries fearlessly. 
A person making a stop gesture.
Saying no with confidence is crucial part of setting healthy boundaries.

2# Be aware that others will say no to you too

One of the most common misconceptions that people don't say no to as often is that, if they do, everyone around them will behave the same way. They won't. And they shouldn't. This is a cruel world with a lot of toxic people, and everyone needs to look after themselves. So, don't be afraid to set boundaries and say no when needed. An excellent way to start is to listen to people saying no to you. Also, you can try and follow what people you consider confident say when they don't feel comfortable with something. Raising awareness that other people do it too can be a great push in the right direction since it won't be as uncomfortable for you to say it. 

3# Instead of being aggressive, try being assertive

​People often assume they need to be rude while rejecting an offer to show how serious they are. Avoiding aggression in favor of a more emphatic "no" usually leads to greater understanding and compromise. Keep your cool and avoid being impolite. Saying no should be done with clarity and compassion for the other person's sentiments.

Politely declining is not bad

​Being assertive enables you to articulate your thoughts and feelings in a manner that the other person can hear and comprehend while yet feeling heard and comprehended. This easy method of politely declining others' requests can help you develop a stronger sense of self-expression and clarity about what really works for you. These are the third of several easy ways to avoid saying yes when you really mean no.
A professional person smiling.
You can still say no and still be polite about it.

4# The key is being straightforward

​Keeping things simple is the best. A common mistake among newbies that are only learning to say "No" is giving too much explanation. You have your reasons and don't have to write an essay about them for the other party. Instead, you can briefly explain why you can't do it and let the individual know. You don't need to go into too much detail since it isn't necessary and might lead to the other party attempting to argue your position when all you want to say is, "No, thank you."

5# Rehearse saying no with confidence

​Not everyone is extroverted enough to be comfortable with saying no eye-to-eye. There are many people with performance anxiety, and that's okay. However, you can't permanently hide behind a text or an email. It's helpful to practice saying "no" in advance, so you're ready for these scenarios. Rehearsing your lines in front of a mirror will help alleviate your concerns about sounding robotic or unnatural. An even better and more efficient rehearsal would be in front of someone you love and trust. A family member or friend can help assure you that you're doing it alright and that it's normal before you get comfortable enough to say it to other people.
A person in front of the mirror.
If you find it hard to talk to another person right away, make sure to practice what you would say in front of a mirror.

6# Appropriate body language can make things easier

​The first thing people notice, subconsciously and often consciously, is how your body presents your decision to the world. Strong and confident leaders send messages via their bodies before they open their mouths. A good rule of thumb is to practice saying no to your body via some general "negative" body language. For example:
  • Turning your back to someone can let them know you don't want to talk to them without even saying no.
  • Crossing your arms is a universal sign that some negation might be in the near future.
  • Pointing your foot in the opposite direction of the person you're talking to or leaning on the other side is a more subtle yet effective signs.
Let your body speak for itself and prepare the other person for rejection.

Final thoughts

​Saying yes all the time can be exhausting and energy-draining. Once you see that a simple "No" is not a bad word (quite the opposite), you'll have much more time and energy to invest in things you want to say yes to. So, try out these strategies for communicating no with confidence and witness the significant difference yourself. This will significantly help your evolution as a person and a path to a happier life.
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Author's Bio

​Monica Adams is a psychologist and a consultant at Royal Moving Company, invested in helping people deal with stressful times and other day-to-day problems. She says she’s the happiest when she spends a day in the sun with her family and when she sees that her advice helped someone in need. 

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11/16/2022

How to Deal with Mental Health If You Can’t Afford Therapy

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A stressed-out girl with her hands on her head
​With a record number of individuals experiencing mental health problems like depression, there is a greater need than ever for effective medical care. More than half of individuals in the United States who suffer from a mental health condition do not get help for it. The CDC reports a sharp increase in the adolescent suicide rate, which is more proof of a severe shortage of care among this population. Unfortunately, adolescents may be the most vulnerable because they often don't have the means to afford therapy. Trying to deal with mental health if you can't afford therapy is really tough. However, always remember that everyone has the power to overcome this on their own as well. 

6 Ways to Deal with Mental Health if You Can't Afford Therapy 

​But why individuals aren't receiving the assistance they need? Well, it's not a simple answer. Campaigns like Mental Health Awareness Month strive to reduce the stigma associated with mental illness. Still, the truth remains that mental health has not been given the same level of attention as physical health by our healthcare system. For example, there is no such thing as an annual mental health checkup covered by insurance, and therapists who take insurance sometimes have to put in twice as much effort simply to be compensated. Unfortunately, not everyone has a low-stress job, so many people are struggling with anxiety and depression. However, there are other ways to deal with mental health if you can't afford therapy. 
Wondering how to deal with mental health if you can't afford therapy
Mental health often doesn't get the attention it needs.

1. Check with your insurance company 

In the event that you receive coverage via your job, the Health Insurance Marketplace, or Medicaid, you will have access to the following basic mental health services:
  • psychotherapy
  • counseling
  • hospital care
  • Remedy for Substance Abuse Disorders
You cannot be refused coverage no matter what; however, your state and health insurance plan will determine the specifics of your coverage (such as your copay or coinsurance amount). Annual depression screenings are among the mental health therapies covered by Medicare Part B. Make an appointment with a therapist who is part of your insurance's "network," if at all possible. If you see a therapist who is "out of network," your insurance may not cover their services, and you may end up paying more out of pocket.

​However, not every therapist will work with your insurance.
If the therapist accepts your insurance, you may go ahead and schedule an appointment with them. Copayments and coinsurance should be covered by your Health Savings Account (HSA) if you have a high-deductible health insurance plan.

2. Talk to a psychologist in training

Think about visiting a clinic where aspiring psychologists get hands-on experience. Most of these clinics may be found on school campuses that provide programs leading to certification as therapists. Your therapist may still be a student, but they will be working under the supervision of a licensed professional at all times
A girl in a therapy session
Talking to students in training can be very beneficial. It's one of the best ways to deal with mental health if you can't afford therapy.
​Clients shouldn't be reluctant to work with an intern or trainee. Interns have a lot of supervision, are highly industrious, and are enthusiastic about assisting customers. Interns have fresh and up-to-date educational training and can sometimes be seen for a very cheap fee. You can finally stop worrying about money. Student therapists are oftentimes more eager to help out than the already established ones. 

3. Look into community mental health centers

Community centers for mental health care are another excellent option. They have a deeper understanding of the neighborhood challenges and cultural perspectives on mental health that they serve. They help those struggling with mental health issues and may help lessen the social stigma associated with such conditions. You can learn some healthy practices from these community centers and get the benefits of mental health counseling. Additionally, they have been demonstrated to aid in lowering suicide rates. You can find these across the country.

4. Become a member of a local or online support groups 

​There are a lot of free support groups, trauma support groups, and addiction recovery support groups available via nonprofits, volunteers, and local organizations. For instance, a wide variety of support groups are available to those dealing with substance use disorder, mental disorders, and domestic violence.  In addition to local support groups, the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) also provides free peer-led support groups for people with mental illness in every major city.

5. Self-help literature, meditation apps, and podcasts 

You may do various things under your own steam that will contribute to your emotional and physical well-being. Look for books on self-improvement at your local library or budget bookstore. For anyone struggling with mental health concerns like sadness, anxiety, or loss, there are plenty of books that may help. If you like reading, this is a great way to learn more about your condition and try to implement some advice. 
A man reading a book
You can learn a lot from self-help books.
Free smartphone applications may help with mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Similarly, there are podcasts, online blogs, and forums that focus on mental health and healing. These aids are not a replacement for conventional treatment, but they may be useful when combined.

​6. If you are religious, try speaking with a member of your church

​People seeking mental health treatment may greatly benefit from assistance based on faith and religion. You may expect to be treated with kindness and compassion, and the assistance you get will be consistent with your morals and beliefs. Get in touch with other members of your church or search online for local support groups. Having friends and family there for you is a huge help, and having ties to your neighborhood really helps a lot. Even if their primary purpose is not to improve mental health, consistent social interactions, such as those seen in religious organizations or social clubs, may have a profound effect. Having your people around to support you is one of the best ways to deal with mental health if you can't afford therapy.
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Fiona Jenkins is an aspiring journalist who likes to focus on important causes that can make an impact on our community. 

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10/29/2022

How Much Money Did ADHD Cost Me So Far in 2022?

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I was recently diagnosed with ADHD (and autism, but we’ll talk about that on another day) and have been doing lots of research in the past few months to try to understand myself a bit better and also make my life easier. It has been wonderful to finally understand why I do some of the things that I have tried to stop myself from doing for YEARS. I hated the fact that I was always late, always forgetting things, couldn’t remember where I’d put anything or even what an address was for more than what felt like seconds… and so many other things. Finding a community of adults like me has been eye opening and absolutely lovely. Being able to understand why I do the things that I do and how to help myself stay on track in this world a bit better has been so helpful, especially with my new job.

When I moved into this new position earlier in the year I was having such a hard time finding a rhythm and keeping myself on track. Without many set deadlines and a much more open schedule to do the projects that would benefit the company the most, I would either go down a rabbit hole into a project for days at a time or find it difficult to get started at all, there was little in between. I was floundering for the first time, career-wise, in my life. I spoke with a colleague about it and she suggested speaking to my supervisor and asking for more structure… but I wanted to make it work. I had run my own business for years, I could do this! I could, just give me a couple of months to figure out how to make my brain work the way I needed it to!

Well, yes, I did figure out how to make my days more effective and how to feel productive in general, but it took more than a little bit of time. It took realizing that I may have ADHD, learning about it, getting diagnosed, and then diving head first into learning about the diagnosis and what it meant for me. I’ll talk about the process and what made me realize this may be something I needed to look into in another post but for today I wanted to just pop in a little bit of backstory before getting into today’s topic as I haven’t mentioned having ADHD before.

This week I was listening to another content creator on YouTube, How to ADHD, as she discussed what she referred to as the “ADHD tax” and it made me wonder how much ADHD had cost me financially over the years. There is no way to know for sure, as much of the financial costs that I came up with were due to simply losing or forgetting about things and I never thought to track those instances. If I forget the coupons or grocery list on the counter when I went to the store… how much did that cost? $20? $30? Nothing? I have no way to know for sure. What about when I traveled to Canada and forgot my charger or the time I left my headphones at, well, who even knows where? Or the cost that all the different organization methods I’ve tried over the years has cost me? Its rather ridiculous when I think about how much money I wouldn’t have spent if I had known what I know now about myself and could have set up better systems sooner. 

I was able to come up with a list of items that were purchased this year that I know were due to my ADHD as well as a list of some other estimated costs to give myself a hopefully accurate guess-timate if you will on 2022’s cost so far.
Looking through my expenses, the following costs are directly attributable, and totaled $313.09:
  • Late Fees: $53.83
  • Magnets for Kitchen: $20.54
  • Books: $19.00
  • Silent Clock: $21.64
  • Stim Toys: $67.43
  • Flare Calmer & Case: $40.73
  • Headphones (3 Pairs): $ 64.92
  • Diagnostic Tests: $25 (Copay)​
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The Flare Calmer, Headphones and Silent Clock could probably go halfsies with the autism but for now, we’ll leave them here.

Organizational costs included items such as a planner, key holder, extra sets of markers  so that they were always at point of use, labels, a whiteboard calendar, clear boxes for storage, and etc. This category ended up costing me a minimum of $336.15. There were a few purchases that I didn’t include as well as some organization costs that I didn’t count towards this year’s costs as I was already doing them in 2021 but would definitely go there. This also doesn’t count costs when my employer paid for things like the copious amount of sticky notes that I have gone through this year.

The final costs ended up being purely estimates as there was no way to really track them, as mentioned before:
  • Special Interests: $300
  • Lost Items: $80
  • Forgotten Items: $200
  • Unplanned Spending (Dopamine Seeking): $400 Minimum
… and the biggie: Restaurants… Restaurant spending has been the bane of my budgeting life. I always wanted to cut it but never could seem to do so. Now that I have been learning more about myself, my habits and my diagnosis I realize that the reason I spend so much has to do with the fact that when I’m driving somewhere I tend to make a detour for either the caffeine that keeps me running or for a bite to eat far too often and the reasoning is kind of boring… dopamine. Restaurant food seems more exciting to my brain for some reason, it has lots of things in it that make the dopamine receptors in my brain have a fireworks show. Be it the salt, the palatableness, the sugar, or even the variety- go home and have leftovers or have a taco at that place coming up around the corner? The Heather Brain screams “taco” in response to this one, every time. Its difficult to stop from veering towards that dopamine hit when I’m tired and have a long drive home ahead of me. Simple as that. If I said that half of my restaurant spending was due to this chasing of a quick dopamine hit, I would have spent nearly $1,600 so far this year. Its ridiculous. 

If we add it all up, the total was $3,219.74 and I didn’t even account for everything. For instance, I didn’t really have any medical costs this year that hit my budget directly as I tend to spend all of my out of pocket max on medications and appointments for my other medical issues very early in the year, but if ADHD was the only thing I was spending on I can see how medications and appointments would easily eat into my budget there as well. There are so many things that I didn’t realize about my spending habits, even being as deep into budgeting and analyzing my spending as I am, until I started looking at it with this lens. I will definitely start looking into other areas of my life from new angles going forward as this was enlightening. 

Until next time,
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10/22/2022

5 Low-Budget Vacation Ideas

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low-budget vacation - coastline view
​Vacations are great, but they can also be expensive. Luckily, there are many ways to get away without breaking the bank. Here we've put together a list of five low-budget vacation ideas you should consider. These are guaranteed to leave you feeling relaxed and refreshed.

Go Camping

If you're looking for a low-cost vacation idea, consider camping. This is a great way to spend time with family and friends and get away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Also, it’s a good way to enjoy the outdoors. If you work in an office or handling a stressful job, camping can help you leave your work at work and clear your thoughts. Although it’s not the most luxurious way to travel, it’s usually a wholesome experience for people who enjoy it together. The best part is that you camp anywhere – you can choose a campsite or in your own backyard.

​Visit a National Park

If you love the great outdoors, taking a vacation to a national park is an affordable option that doesn't require much planning.
Travel accessories on a road map
For a relaxing low-budget trip, all you need is good company!
​National parks are often overlooked when people think of a low-budget vacation because they're free and accessible. However, they provide a lot of value for the money, especially if you're looking to spend time in nature instead of paying for hotels and restaurants.
​
Many national parks offer campgrounds with sites that cost less than $20 per night. You can expect to get access to hiking trails, waterfalls, museums, and more without breaking your budget. If your dream vacation includes hiking through mountains or swimming in lakes surrounded by trees, visiting one of these natural wonders should be at the top of your list!

​​Check Out Your State Park System

You don’t have to head out of the country or even out of state. Your backyard is full of incredible natural beauty, and all you need to do is explore it. You should consider checking out your state park system for recreational opportunities, historic sites, and more. Many states have parks that are just as spectacular as national parks but without the crowds and high price tags. You can find state parks in every corner of the country, from Hawaii's Haleakala National Park on Maui to Tennessee's Natural Bridge State Park near Nashville.
​
And if you’re lucky enough to live near a national park, it can be a good way to travel and not worry about money. You won’t be disappointed. State parks are often less crowded than their national counterparts, which means you’ll have more time to explore and enjoy the great outdoors. And if you’re lucky enough to live near a national park, make sure you visit. You won’t be disappointed.

​Explore Your Hometown or a Nearby City as if You Were a Tourist

If you're looking for an inexpensive vacation that doubles as a learning experience, try exploring your hometown or a nearby city as if you were a tourist. You'll have a better appreciation for the things you take for granted, and who knows? You may even make some new friends with locals.
Yosemite national park
Visiting a national park can be a great way to save money!
This is especially fun if you live in an area with rich history, architecture, or cultural traditions. For example, if you're visiting New York City with family members, they'll love learning about Ellis Island. You can take a walk around Battery Park or visit the Statue of Liberty.


In case you're looking for a more exotic vacation, consider a trip to another country. You can save money by staying in hostels or renting an apartment instead of staying at expensive hotels.
​

Traveling is usually a costly affair. If you are looking for a cheap vacation, you will have to be creative. There are many ways that one can go on a low-budget vacation. You don't need to spend a lot of money to plan a relaxing vacation! If you know how to plan your travel budget properly, then even the most budget-conscious travelers can enjoy themselves without breaking their bank accounts.

​Tips for Planning a Low-Budget Vacation

If you want to save money while traveling and still have a great experience, consider the following:
  • Always keep an eye out for deals and discounts. Also, consider booking your travels well in advance.
  • Many websites provide great deals and discounts on vacations, hotels, car rentals, and more. If you go online and search for them, chances are high that you will be able to find some great offers.
  • Travel with friends! You’ll realize that there’s more to your vacation than spending money. Moreover, you can share some costs between you and remember your travels for life.

Consider Taking a Road Trip

Most people in the US would agree that road trips are the best! You can see a lot of places in a short amount of time, and you don't have to worry about finding hotels or staying with friends. Plus, they're great for families!
A view of the forest from a camping tent.
If you'd like to travel with friends, consider camping.
I recommend taking road trips across California because it's beautiful and has so many instagrammable places and beautiful spots in the state you should check out. Here are some of the best ones:
  • Big Sur
  • Yosemite National Park
  • Lake Tahoe
  • Sequoia National Forest

​If you're looking for affordable hotels near these places, consider staying in a hotel near Yosemite National Park. There are so many hotels there, and they all have great views! You can also stay in San Francisco if you want to spend less money on your trip.

If you're looking for hotels in San Francisco, staying at the Palace Hotel could be a great option. It's one of the oldest hotels in San Francisco and has amazing views of downtown. You can also stay at The Ritz Carlton if you want something more luxurious!

​Conclusion

We hope these ideas gave you some inspiration for your next low-budget vacation. And if you're still not sure where to go, take your time. Think about the places you want to see, and try booking your trip a few months in advance. This will most likely save you money and allow you to plan your trip to the detail. Choose your destination, and have a nice trip!
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10/18/2022

5 Exciting Cities to Visit During Your Next Self-Care Trip

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​Are you in need of some self-care? Taking a wellness vacation is a great way to leave your cares behind and reset your mind and body. This trip is all about you and your needs! When you take time to care for yourself, you’ll be better able to handle the responsibilities of daily life, like caring for family or navigating work challenges. Put life on hold for a little while and treat yourself to an enjoyable getaway. Courtesy of Real Life with Heather, here are five fantastic cities to visit if you’re seeking self-care!

New York City, NY​

​While many people seek relaxation on sunny beaches and shaded forests, others are calmed and comforted by the hustle and bustle of city life. If this describes you, consider booking a self-care trip to New York City! NYC is always an exciting vacation destination. You’ll never run out of things to do in the Big Apple, from visiting historic monuments to exploring famous museums.
 
If you’re a sports fan, NYC is the place to be. Treat yourself to a game at the world-renowned Yankee Stadium! Look for discounted tickets on ticket seller websites that offer advanced search features to help you find tickets based on date, price range, and seat ratings. Some websites even offer sports fans a chance to peek at the in-seat views before purchasing tickets. 

Orlando, FL

​Naturally, the first thing everyone thinks about when it comes to Orlando is Disney World. However, there’s plenty of other things to see and do – if and when you get tired of Disney World, that is. But be warned: there’s so much there that it’s impossible to cover everything in a day (or even two), so it’s a good idea to check sites like Mouse Life Today so that you can plan your budget and itinerary well in advance. And don’t worry – you can always go again!

Salt Lake City, UT

​Serving as a gateway to five of America’s national parks, Salt Lake City is a fantastic travel destination for hikers. The city itself boasts amazing dining options, interesting historic sites, beautiful architecture, and eye-catching street art. Downtown Salt Lake City is very pedestrian-friendly. You can even rent bikes or electric scooters to get around, so save some money and skip the rental car. Check out VisitSaltLake.org to find more information about this wonderful city!

Aspen, CO

Aspen features world-class skiing in the winter and beautiful hiking opportunities in summer. If you’d rather spend your self-care vacation taking in the great outdoors than walking around a city, Aspen could be your perfect trip! Travel + Leisure describes Aspen as one of the world’s most accessible mountain getaways. The small town has everything you could ever want, from a vibrant outdoor dining district to trendy neighborhood shops. Take in the art scene, enjoy a high-class meal, and hike to a gorgeous alpine lake. You’re bound to return from your visit feeling relaxed and refreshed!

Boston, MA

Another exciting city adventure, Boston is one of the most popular tourist destinations on the East Coast. The city is brimming with historic sites, incredible architecture, and fresh seafood. You can spend your trip exploring museums, discovering beautiful parks, or setting sail on a whale-watching cruise. Boston truly has something for everyone!

Preparing for Your Trip

Before embarking on your self-care adventure, make some work preparations so you don’t have to worry about what’s going on back at home. If you run your own business, inform your clients and customers that you’ll be away for a few days and consider hiring a virtual assistant to handle your daily responsibilities while you’re away. If possible, try to get some extra work done before you leave. This way, you won’t have to face the stress of playing catchup right after your relaxing vacation.
 
While self-care can and should be a daily practice, sometimes you just need to get out of town for a dedicated self-care trip. Start looking for places you could go and things you could do, like visiting Disney World or exploring the national parks surrounding Salt Lake City. As long as you make a few work preparations before leaving, you’ll be able to enjoy a carefree getaway!

Real Life with Heather is here to help you live life, set goals, and be amazing. Feel free to check out our blog archive!
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10/1/2022

The Best Low-Stress Jobs for People with Anxiety

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A woman sitting in an office and using her laptop.
Having to work a 9-5 job is not an easy task if you suffer from anxiety. The modern work environment is generally stressful, and many factors could cause people to become overwhelmed. From chaotic environments and strict deadlines to all social encounters (with managers, colleagues, customers, clients, etc.), many things can trigger a person with anxiety. Yes, most of the known jobs fit this description. But, don't worry - there are some exceptions. Namely, there exist some low-stress jobs for people with anxiety that you can do either in the comfort of your home or in a private office space.
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These jobs do not take their toll on your mental health and don't leave you drained after working hours. Thus, do not panic because there is something for you out there! And, we will help you find the perfect job for your needs. So, if you want to know what are some best low-stress jobs for people with anxiety, keep on reading.

Transcriptionist​

Have you heard of transcriptionists? They are people who change spoken words into written ones. If you opt for this profession, you will probably work outside your home. Most transcriptionists work in different settings, such as in courtrooms, surgery rooms, etc. However, don't let that scare you - as a transcriptionist, your only job would be to write down what is happening around you. Or, you may need to write down someone's thoughts. You will never be in the center of attention and never have to deal with toxic people - that is why this is one of the best jobs for people with anxiety. 
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However, if you feel that being in an environment where you have to work in real-time, other transcription jobs are also available. You can look for work as a transcriptionist who types out the audio from pre-recorded footage. You can also do this job remotely, so you won't have to leave your home. You will also be able to pause or rewind the recording if you missed something, which will further reduce the level of stress and pressure you are dealing with
A woman writing on her laptop.
Transcription is great for people who don't like to socialize.

Freelance

We live in the age of technology. So, why not take advantage of it? Become a freelancer, and decide how much work you will take on! Even though you will be your boss and work from the comfort of your home, you will still have no limits. Of course, you must possess good skills, some experience, and a lot of creativity and patience, but hey, that is a small price to pay for one of the best low-stress jobs for people with anxiety.
There are many different types of freelance jobs you can choose from. For instance: 
  • Content writing 
  • Editor
  • Web developer
  • Accountant 
  • Virtual assistant 
  • Graphic designer
The best part of having a freelance job is working from home. But don't let that excite you too much! Working from home can sometimes become dull and uninspiring. You may become lazy, and you may start procrastinating. However, there is a 'cure' for that too - having a nice home office. If you are working from home in a studio apartment, you should look for ways to maximize space. Doing that will help you stay motivated, maintain your routine, and set boundaries. 

Housekeeping or Cleaning

Many people find housekeeping or cleaning jobs to be degrading. But, there is no degrading in this honest work. You will earn your salary just like everybody else, and you will not have to worry about things that may trigger your anxiety. Most housekeepers and cleaners do jobs requiring little to no encounter with people and stressful situations. You will have no supervision, a steady routine, and peace, and you will always be able to leave work at work. 
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Moreover, remember that some cleaning positions are better for people with anxiety than others. For example, if you don't want to have any contact with other people and don't want to be somewhere where you will have to handle other people's personal items, you should opt for cleaning offices and commercial buildings. There, you will work only night or early morning shifts when no one is around. Additionally, the act of cleaning something is said to reduce stress and positively affect depression. 
A man cleaning.
Cleaning is a great way for people with anxiety to manage their symptoms naturally.

Artist

​When we think about art, we envision a free time activity, not a job that pays our bills. But why is that? Art is an essential part of the corporate world. For instance, some sort of the artists that are always needed are: 
  • Photographers 
  • Painters 
  • Illustrators 
  • Fashion designers 
  • Makeup artists
  • Cake decorators 
All these jobs are stress-free. Moreover, all these jobs proved to be very helpful to people suffering from anxiety or other mental health problems. And, don't trust the fact that artists don't make a lot of money; that is simply not true! Professional makeup artists, for example, charge approximately 100$ for just one hour of work. Thus, stop worrying about money, and if you have some artistic hobby that you have always wanted to turn into a profit, now is the time.
A woman painting.
Art helps us get rid of stress!

Librarian

We simply cannot talk about the best low-stress jobs for people with anxiety and not mention librarians. Librarians work in the quiet parts of schools and libraries, of course. Their job is to give people the book they want and to provide them with some piece of information if necessary. However, even the job of a librarian has been slightly modernized. Yes, gone are the days when you will have to look for a specific book for hours. Nowadays, you just type what you need on your computer, and the program tells you exactly where the book is. So, yes, as a librarian, you will have to stay on top of technology, but you will still be working in the quiet company of books.
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As you have seen, there are many great low-stress jobs for people with anxiety. We mentioned just a couple of the most anxiety-friendly ones, but trust us, there are many more out there. For instance, check out professions such as landscaping, medical coding, etc. Or focus on freelance jobs such as blogging, proofreading, data entry, programming, etc.
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8/28/2022

The Dos and Don'ts of Dealing with Toxic People

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A representation of dealing with toxic people.
Pollution is all around us. Rivers, soil, air... there's toxic waste everywhere. However, the most dangerous toxins often come in human forms. It can be the most charming person in your environment or someone very close to you. People you're closest to have the most power to poison you. If they have that kind of venom in their heart, you can be exposed to the most difficult toxicity of all. In those situations, it's essential to recognize the problem and follow the basic dos and don'ts of dealing with toxic people.

Do: Put a finger on their effect on your emotions

The most dangerous toxin that toxic people produce is the one that wraps up all the other toxins in a shiny paper of false good intention. Manipulative people often come off as the most charming and sincere human beings. Months may pass before you even begin to comprehend that something is not quite right. But, once you hear that tiny voice in your ear that starts whispering around them, it's time to take a good look at your inner being. They're saying the sweetest things, but somehow your gut turns to knot every time they open their mouth.
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Listen to your emotions. Emotions that you feel are effective subconscious defense mechanisms that you should never ignore. The only way you'll be able to deal with toxic people and defend yourself from malice is - to identify and acknowledge your inner defense mechanisms.
Five eggs representing different emotions.
Don’t ignore your emotions; they’re there to warn you before your conscious self can comprehend what’s going on.

Don't: Let them under your skin

One of the few worst talents toxic people possess is making you doubt yourself. They master the art of destroying confidence and making people insecure. Keep in mind - no one is always right, and no one is always wrong. So, if someone makes you feel like you're a walking mistake, it's probably because they're subtly tearing your confidence and draining your energy for a long time. Once you recognize that behavior, make sure not to let that person influence your self-esteem; build a wall by using your logic. Separate what they say from what they do. That will help you put everything in perspective and put your thoughts first.

Do: Make a distance

Your surroundings have a significant impact on your outer and inner well-being. That's why, when you recognize the toxic person in your immediate environment, you must take proper measures to distance yourself as soon as possible. Unfortunately, one of the drastic measures that are vital sometimes is moving far away. According to experts at familyaffairmoving.com, in cases when your psychological well-being depends on the move, it's best to find a new home at a place that motivates you and helps you feel at peace. 

Or find the alternative

However, sometimes, it's not possible to do that. In those cases, a good alternative is to:
  • spend the bare minimum of your time with the toxic person
  • be unavailable
  • make a mental distance from their attitude
  • physically remove yourself from their radiant aura

Don't: Let them suck you in their universe

Being around poisonous conduct can wear you out. This individual probably continually grumbles about other people, always has a new tale about the injustice they endure, or they try to convince you that you hurt them in some way. What is happening is that they are drawing your subconsciousness into the miserable world of dull suffering. The best thing you can do is to avoid any further interaction. Resist the temptation to join them in grumbling or defend yourself against their charges. A good old "that's tough, buddy" and walking away will do the job perfectly. It will be better for your health to read a good book or do something creative instead of wasting time listening to someone's whining. 
A woman reading a book.
Reading about the lead character’s struggles will be way more productive for you than dealing with toxic people and letting a toxic person drain your energy.

Do: Work on yourself

​Toxic individuals will make every effort to highlight your shortcomings and minimize your accomplishments. This is how they maintain their position of control. The best thing you can do is to work on yourself and accept every single bit of your being. Focus on self-care. If you are able to take ownership of both your strengths and shortcomings, then what other people think of you won't matter. You will know that your strengths are more than sufficient to make your deficiencies irrelevant, and no one can use them against you (no matter how hard they try).

Don't: Try to fix them

​It's a tale as old as time that manipulative and toxic persons take their malign, broken personalities and mask them into something naive that 'just' needs help. Many women stay in abusive relationships with manipulative partners because they think they can help and fix them. However, the truth is - you can't fix anyone, especially not a toxic person. They are the only ones that can improve themselves if they choose to do so. Unfortunately, that is unlikely to happen. Remember that toxic persons love to feed off your empathy and suck the life out of people around them. Invest your time and energy in personal growth and achieving life goals. 
Bob the Builder toy
Not even Bob the Builder can fix a person that doesn’t want to be fixed. Don’t waste your time.

Dealing with toxic people is not easy​

​It's easy to give advice about dealing with toxic people from a distance. Doing it is something else. You might feel trapped and suffocated internally. You might feel like you're not strong enough to do it on your own. And that's completely alright. There's no shame in needing help. When you recognize the problem, make sure to seek it from the people you fully trust or experienced mental health professionals. Don't forget - even if everything seems dark and miserable, hope waits at the bottom of Pandora's box. There's no obstacle you can't overcome, and you'll come out as a winner from this too. Believe in yourself. I believe in you. 
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7/23/2022

Tips for Coping with Climate Anxiety and Taking Action for the Planet

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​If concerns about climate change are keeping you up at night, you’re not alone. It’s easy to get discouraged by all the bad news about burning forests, rising sea levels, air pollution, struggling wildlife, and the general destruction of our natural environment for political and financial gain. The media constantly reminds us about all the ways in which we’re killing our beloved planet, and it’s normal to feel a sense of guilt and despair around this news.
 
The good news is that there’s a lot you can do to relieve your climate anxiety and stand up for our planet. Every one of us has the power to heal the environment through actions big and small. Whether good or bad, the choices made by homeowners, business owners, and everyday consumers can snowball into significant environmental impacts.
 
In this article from Real Life With Heather, we share some tips to help you cope with climate-related stress as well as a few impactful steps you can take to join the fight against climate change.

Relieving Climate Anxiety

Managing climate anxiety is not about minimizing your reaction to this serious global issue. Far from it! We should be worried about where the world is headed. Psycom.net explains that the first step to coping with climate anxiety is allowing yourself to feel your feelings—whether anxiety, grief, worry, or anger—without judging them or trying to push them away. Acknowledge that your emotions are valid. You’ll find that once you accept your anxiety instead of trying to fight it, the intensity of your anxiety will fade immensely.
 
Next, recognize that it’s not your job to save the planet. You alone are not responsible for climate change. If you believe that the weight of the world is yours to bear, you will feel like a failure whenever you hear news about ecological losses. Instead, try to feel good about all the actions you’re taking to reduce your personal impact on the planet! Recognize that people and organizations all over the world are stepping up to engage in climate activism, and by getting involved, you too can make a difference.
 
Taking action against climate change is a great way to move forward from feelings of anxiety and grief. In the next section, we’ll explore a few ways you can use your strengths, capacities, and resources to get involved!
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Become an Ecopreneur

For some people, getting involved in the fight against climate change means starting a business that seeks to solve an existing sustainability problem. If you’re business-minded and have a passion for the environment, consider becoming an ecopreneur yourself! Ecopreneurs are business owners who prioritize the planet and people over profits. Whether it’s rescuing items from the landfill for upcycling or offering eco-friendly landscaping services to local homeowners, your sustainable business is bound to make a difference.
 
Before launching your business, you’ll have to learn how to set up a new company. Take the time to create a business plan for your new eco-friendly company. Choose a suitable business structure. Many small businesses start out as sole proprietorships, but LLCs enjoy more perks including personal liability protection and tax benefits. Also research your target market and form strategies on how you’ll market your products or services.
 
It’s also crucial that you set up an invoicing process that gets you paid quickly. Keep terms simple and offer customers multiple payment options. You can create eye-catching branded invoices with an online invoice generator. Choose an invoice template and then personalize it with your own logo, slogan, and design elements.

Make Eco-Friendly Shopping Choices

​Feeling guilty about your individual impact on the planet is not the answer. Research shows that just 90 companies are responsible for nearly two-thirds of global greenhouse gas emissions! As consumers, we have a lot of power to sway the behaviors of these major corporations. Let’s hold these companies accountable! Shop from companies that are doing good for the planet, and stop purchasing products from those that are causing harm. You can find a lot of great information about corporate responsibility and sustainability online.
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Reduce Consumption and Waste

​Beyond shopping from sustainable companies, an even better way to reduce your impact is to curb your consumption altogether. Break up with packaged foods, fast fashion, and poor-quality products that are designed to deteriorate quickly. When you need to buy something, whether it’s clothing, appliances, hobby supplies, or furniture, look for second-hand options before buying new. When you head to the grocery store, stick to the produce aisles and pick up whole foods that don’t require processing and packaging. Be mindful of your shopping habits and aim to reduce, reuse, and recycle—in that order!
 
Food waste is a significant problem contributing to climate change. According to Innovate Eco, food waste that ends up in the landfill produces methane and carbon dioxide due to the lack of oxygen during decomposition. Not only that, but wasted food means wasting the vast resources that went into producing, transporting, and storing the food. Try to waste less—and compost your scraps!
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Support Biodiversity In Your Backyard

If you have a backyard, there’s a lot you can do to support the local biodiversity of plants and animals in your area. Backyard habitats are home to many native species. Unfortunately, many properties feature large expanses of pesticide-ridden lawn that provide few benefits to the plants and animals that support our delicate ecosystem. Consider doing some eco-friendly landscaping in your backyard to provide a home for bees, birds, insects, and other beneficial fauna.
 
As the world’s environmental issues continue to worsen, increasing levels of climate anxiety are sure to follow. Unfortunately, worrying about the state of the environment is the reality of being human at the time in history. Use your feelings as fuel! Take action against climate change however you can. When we all act together, we can make a difference!
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7/16/2022

7 Ways to Leave Work at Work

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A stressed-out woman working.
​We are all familiar with the fact that working long hours leads to burnout, stress, anxiety, and even severe health diseases such as heart attacks. But, despite all of that, we continue to push ourselves to work even harder and longer. An average person works 45 hours a week. And, some people work even 50 or more hours a week. If that weren't enough, they all fail to leave work at work and bring it home instead. They spend 'after hours' answering emails, returning phone calls, making presentations, etc.
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Most people believe that working more will contribute to higher productivity (which will, in return, contribute to more accomplishments). However, overworking can only make you less productive! When you burn out your mind and body, they stop functioning properly. Thus, it is necessary to leave work at work and use your free time to relax and recharge. We know how difficult that may be for some of you, but you must try! So, here are our seven ways to leave work at work. 

1. Plan the End of Your Work Day 

This sounds relatively straightforward, but many people fail to do so. Namely, when we arrive at work, we tend to go with the flow, finish tasks, procrastinate if there is time, or even complete some daily habits that drain our energy instead of helping us. But then, at the end of the work day, we realize we haven't done any prioritizing. So, we are forced to stay longer or bring our work home. This is all because we didn't plan the end of our workday!
 
To prevent this from happening, in other words, to leave work at work, plan when you want to leave. Then, prioritize everything that you must do until that time. Don't waste your time on anything irrelevant. Plan your day and stick to that plan. 
Hands of a businessman.
Don't be afraid to look at your watch while at work – let it remind you when it's time to leave.

2. Notify Everybody That You Have to Leave at a Certain Time 

If you constantly volunteer to work overtime, your colleagues and managers will get used to that. They expect you to finish everybody's work, fix all the problems, and simply handle everything they don't want to do. But, no matter how much you like working and being in charge of everything, doing all this work overtime will, sooner or later, drive you crazy. It will stress you out. Then, you will either get into a fight with somebody or with yourself.
 
Neither of these 'stress managements' is good. You need to find healthy ways to deal with it and reduce overall stress. For instance, you can tell everybody that you won't be able to stay after working hours. Or, you can ask them to call you only during working hours. Do this once, then twice, every day of the week, and everybody around you will stop giving you last-minute tasks or expect your help after 5 PM.

3. Give Yourself Time to Leave 

​Even if you decide to leave work at work, it will be hard at first. Right before you decide to leave, you will be distracted by emails, phone calls, questions from your colleagues, messy files, etc. You mustn't allow these things to prolong your working hours. So, every day, schedule some time to handle everything stopping you from going home. That can be just 20 minutes or half an hour before your departure. Treat those minutes like you would treat an important meeting. Focus on the tasks that must be done and don't allow anything or anybody to interfere. 

4. Prioritize 

To get your paycheck and not worry about money, you need to do your work. And just as previously mentioned, you probably fill your days with random tasks that are not necessarily part of your work, and because of that, you don't finish everything on time. So, you are forced to stay late and do the work that you are paid for.
 
You have to learn how to prioritize! Train yourself (that is, train your mind) to focus on the most important things as soon as you arrive in the office. Finish all the important things ahead of time, and then, if you have some time left, do the less important ones. Or, leave the less important ones for tomorrow. 
A to-do list.
Make a list of priorities as soon as you arrive at work.

5. Schedule Time for Hobbies after Work 

​Maybe you work overtime because you get bored at home. But, who says that you have to go home after work. There are many other places you can go to and have fun. For instance, you can do your favorite hobby after work (go to a pottery class, language class, etc.) or do some physical activity (yoga, pilates, boxing, etc.). Or, go home to focus on cooking your favorite meals and maybe even share your recipes online. Find something that makes you relaxed and happy. Once you do, schedule time for it right after your work. This will undoubtedly motivate you to not overwork and spend your free time doing something you love. 

6. Pick up the Phone 

We love our emails. They are an excellent means of communication. But, sometimes, waiting for a replay can take ages. That drains one's energy and time! So, instead of waiting for an answer to the important email, just pick up the phone. Calling your client, customer, manager, etc., over the phone will save you a lot of time you would otherwise spend typing, responding, checking, sorting, and who knows what else.
Don't allow your cluttered and disorganized inbox to drain your energy and stop you from leaving work at work. To leave work at work, you need to change your strategy. But, of course, check with your manager first! You don't want to infringe on the company's policy.
A businesswoman talking over the phone.
Sometimes, all you have to do to leave work at work is pick up the phone

7. Take Advantage of Technology 

​Phones can save you a lot of time, just like mentioned above. But so can the rest of technology! Technology is there to make our lives (and our work) easier! So, use it to your advantage. Find tools and apps that can help you do your job faster. Get a better phone, laptop, or even a better tablet if necessary. You would be surprised at how much time and energy you can save by using the right technology.
However, don't let that same technology overpower you. When you have so many things in front of you – things that are blinking, clicking, ringing, etc., it is easy to get distracted. So, once again, use technology to your favor and turn it off when you need to stay focused. You can use an app for that too. For instance, an app called Freedom can, upon your command, turn off your Wi-Fi and disconnect you from everything in just one click.
As you have seen, there are many ways you can leave work at work. We mentioned just a few of them, but you already know there are many more ways. You just have to research on your own, try a couple of your ways, and find what works best for you.
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